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January 4, 2021January 4, 2021Calling, Christian Walk, Following Jesus, Uncategorized

Leaning into Rest

Rest. The word conjures up many ideas and pictures of what rest looks like. It is different for everyone. What do you think of when you hear the word? Lounging on a beach? Is it a quiet walk in the woods just listening to the sounds of nature? Taking a nap in a boat? Stealing away to a quiet place with a book? Swinging in a hammock? These are all excellent ways to rest.

If we look at scripture as our sure foundation and Jesus as our teacher we don’t have to look very hard to find times when even He rested. Jesus was often stealing away to “quiet places”. He would slip away from the crowds after preaching and healing the people. One time in particular He took a nap in a boat. In that instance, He was in such a place of rest, that even when a mighty storm blew in, it did not wake Him. Oh to find that kind of rest!

Resting During the Storm

In Matthew 8:23-27, we see the benefit of rest, AND how to rest well even in the midst of great turmoil. In this story, Jesus has gotten into a boat with His disciples after preaching the gospel and healing many. Serving in ministry can be quite exhausting.

My husband and I lead a Pro-life Prayer ministry called Bound4LIFE. Once a month we host a prayer meeting, which I lead. Every month when I leave that meeting I am full of joy, yet exhausted. This is not a worn-out kind of tired because I didn’t want to be there leading the meeting. I leave feeling fulfilled and exhilarated, yet tired because I gave it my all. I imagine it was this kind of tiredness that Jesus was feeling after a long day of preaching and healing the sick.

The verse says they got into the boat and “suddenly” a great storm arose on the water. The very next verse says, “BUT Jesus was sleeping.” To have fallen into such a deep sleep so quickly after getting onto the boat and not waking when the storm started raging, He must have been tired. Well, that and Jesus understood REST! He knew how necessary rest is, but also how to rest well because He knew who His father was and He knew that He could trust Him.

The disciples obviously did not know this kind of rest, not yet. The very first thing they say to rouse Him is, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!” These men are experienced fishermen. They have been out in boats on this lake many times and I”m sure have seen their fair share of storms. Yet, this one was enough to make them think they wouldn’t make it out alive. In the end, Jesus calms the storm and they are amazed.

I’ve always heard this passage taught from the perspective of Jesus calming the storm, but the more I look into it the more I see another perspective. When you look at it from Jesus’ perspective it looks a lot more like a lesson on rest. Yes, Jesus calmed the storm, but in my opinion, He did something more for those men that day. He saved them from drowning that day, and He taught them how to rest. Jesus was teaching His disciples that it doesn’t matter what storm may be swirling around you, rest.

It is in our nature to fight the storms. When I face a storm I immediately go into problem-solving mode. I try to figure my way out. I usually end up beaten down, exhausted, and burnt out by the end. Sometimes I even get to the point where I feel disillusioned with God and ask where He was and why He didn’t break in and make it stop. I Expect Jesus to calm every storm as soon as it starts even as I”m trying to make it stop on my own. Jesus still calms storms, but sometimes we have to rest in the boat as it’s being tossed about.

Burnt Out and Exhausted

Just because Jesus CAN calm storms, doesn’t mean He will calm them in our time table. His ways are not our ways and we don’t always see the whole picture. Not trusting God or leaning into His rest has brought me to a place of feeling weak, and burnt out. This recently came to the forefront during a cry session I was having with my husband. I was lamenting how very tired I was after years of intercession for our nation.

I’m looking at what with human eyes looks to be a steep and steady moral decline in our nation. The destruction of the traditional family, the roles of male and female, and even gender itself. Not to mention the injustices of abortion and human trafficking. In the midst of this little vent session, I told him I didn’t know if I could keep doing this. This standing as an intercessor for the nation. Asking God to come in with mercy and heal our land. I told him I was tired and didn’t think I could stand. I was ready to lay this assignment down. To tell God, sorry, I can’t anymore. Find someone else to carry this burden. I’m done.

My husband is very logical and most of the time when I’m crying about something I just want listening ears, not for him to “fix it”. But, in this case, he offered a solution that stopped me in my tracks and I actually said, “Oh, I never thought of that.” He simply said, “Then rest.” What a simple, yet complicated solution.

I’ve been warring hard for a decade-plus hoping for a shift in our nation towards righteousness. There have been glimpses, but they always seem to fall short of a full turn. I’ve put all the pressure on myself to turn this ship, and I’ve forgotten how to rest in Him. The God we serve is so good! And He is always faithful. While He delights in partnering with us as intercessors, ultimately He is still in control. We can and should engage, but we can not forget to rest in Him.

Learning How to Rest

Isaiah 40:29-31 has brought me comfort and a game plan in this season as I’m learning how to rest.

“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; BUT those who hope in the Lord WILL renew their strength. They WILL soar like eagles; they WILL run and not grow weary, they WILL walk and not faint.” (Emphasis mine)

Even youths grow tired. What a relief! So it’s not simply from age. But here’s the promise, as we lean into Him, and REST, He WILL renew our strength. I don’t know about you, but I need my strength renewed. I need to soar like an eagle and run without getting tired.

These things can not be accomplished by my sheer will to keep going. They are only accomplished when I hope in the Lord. I must remain connected to Him, my ability to run and do all that He has called me to relies on that fact. I will be starting the new year from a place of rest. And as I learn to shift my perspective I will see that even though the storm rages and Jesus can and does calm storms, I can also have peace DURING the storm as long as I keep my eyes fixed on Him.

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November 13, 2020November 13, 2020Adoption, Calling, Christian Walk, Following Jesus, Identity, Motherhood, Uncategorized

A Weak Yes

If you know our story, then you know we have seven children and our youngest is adopted. That’s the short version. The longer version involves years of arguing with God about surrender, complaining about why His timeline was different than mine, and finally submitting to Him because His ways are better.

I didn’t set out to have a large family, in fact, I only really wanted three children. My husband and I celebrated our twentieth anniversary this year and I have to tell you a secret…… The last twenty years have NOT gone according to my plans. As I reflect on twenty years of marriage and more children than I intended on having I have to say this life has been better than anything I could have imagined. Follow Jesus and you’ll never be bored has become my motto. I am certainly NEVER bored! Most days there is so much do to that I don’t know where to begin. I will be the first to tell anyone how unqualified I feel to teach and train these little people in my care. Yet, God has seen fit to call me to this monumental task called motherhood.

Being a mom is a hard and often thankless job. Our work feels endless and monotonous. Moms do the hidden things that no one sees, and certainly don’t think to give thanks for. We do them out of obligation, but also out of love. Preparing and cleaning up from meals is not an easy task when there are nine hungry mouths to feed! Any mother who tells you her favorite part of the day is scrubbing the toilets and doing laundry and dishes is either delusional (Please rescue her and take her on a coffee date!) Or, she’s learned that as much as some tasks are unpleasant, they are a gift to her family and so she does them with joy.

We’ve forgotten that hard things can be full of joy. The lie of the culture is that the only way to find joy is to do the things that bring YOU fulfillment. The truth is, we can find joy in the most mundane and unpleasant tasks when we shift our gaze and change our perspective. I have this little decorative plate propped up by my kitchen sink. Engraved on it is this phrase; “You were made for this”. With seven children, I spend a LOT of time at that sink looking at that plate. I’ve learned that I have a choice in how I view my time there. It can be full of complaining, or full of thankfulness, and joy. A simple phrase sometimes isn’t enough to remind me of that calling. But, I’m glad it’s there because it brings me back every time to the weak yes I’ve given to Jesus over the years.

“You were made for this” and a cameo by our beta fish, ‘Doug’ He’s hiding in the coral.

Washing dishes can be an act of love. Making and serving a meal can show how thankful we are for the family God has surrounded us with. Even mounds and mounds of laundry can be a chance to remind ourselves how blessed we are, (thank God we have clothes to wear!). But in all seriousness, it is all about perspective. When I said “yes” to the Lord in the area of family size, I wasn’t thinking about the laundry, or dishes, or how much food I would have to keep on hand (at this moment we have four teenagers living here! They are like bottomless pits and consume a ton of food!). When I said yes to the Lord, sometimes reluctantly, I was saying yes to His ways, and plans which are higher than mine. I was saying, even though it won’t always be fun, I want to do all You have called me to.

Motherhood is a calling. One I stepped into with just a weak yes, but God has taken that weak yes and blessed me beyond anything I ever dreamed. Sometimes all He’s asking is for a weak yes. For us as daughters of the King to step out of our comfort zone and step into the very thing He made us for. For me, it’s raising world changers. Maybe for you, it’s some other task you feel ill-prepared and unqualified for. If I’ve learned one thing in this journey it’s that God doesn’t call the qualified, but He certainly qualifies those He calls. He’s just waiting for us to say Yes.

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July 15, 2020July 15, 2020Calling, Christian Walk, Dreaming, Following Jesus, Uncategorized

Great Reward

My husband is my favorite cheerleader! Today is our 20th anniversary and I have to brag on him a bit. If you’ve taken a look at the website, or ordered a book and noticed the logo stamped on the bag or envelope, you are seeing the fruit of his labors. He is the graphics guy, I can take zero credit for those things.

Writing the book was his idea. He knew it would be a challenging project, but he also never doubted my ability to finish it. He doesn’t just push, he encourages along the way. Every time I wanted to give up, he gave me space to process my emotions on the subject. Every time I got stuck in the process he helped me find a way out. Last week we got away for a few days and did some hiking in the Blue Ridge Mountains.

The Road Less Traveled

On the last full day of our trip, we hiked a trail that was marked “Strenuous”. It started out fine, but before we even reached the halfway point I was ready to turn back. He encouraged me to keep going. He gave me time to rest, He found chocolate in his bag (a snack he had brought for himself) and gave it to me. All in an effort to encourage me to keep going even when it was hard. He has been this way since the beginning of our marriage. He can be intense at times, but even in his intensity, he is kind.

Similar to this hike, in our journey with God, there will be times it feels easier to give up and turn around. To go back to the smooth, flat, paved path of life. But Oh the things we will miss if we do that! If we turned back in our journey when it got hard we would have missed meeting our daughter, we would not have some of the incredible friendships we have today, and we would not have seen victories through prayer that we have seen over the years.

Following Jesus

In life, there will be times when sacrifice is required to keep following Jesus and where He leads. He never promised it would be an easy, smooth, path. In fact, He says there will be hard things to walk through. It’s basically a guarantee that life won’t be smooth sailing.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you WILL have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33

John 16:33 is one of my favorite verses in the Bible. Because it is so true and I”ve seen it play out in my life over and over again! Rarely is life smooth and easy. It’s often hard and full of difficult circumstances to navigate. But, we are not without hope! Jesus has overcome the world. There is nothing we face that He is not able to help us through. There is never a time when He leaves us to figure it out on our own. He is with us through it all. Not everyone we meet will be up to this challenge of taking the less traveled road. It can seem lonely because taking the harder path sometimes means taking it alone, but the reward for sticking with it in the hard times is great! Even if we don’t recognize it until later.

Streams of Refreshing

We made it to the waterfall! But we still had to make the trek back to the parking lot.

When we finally made it to the halfway point of our hike there was this sweet reward. A beautiful and serene waterfall. It was secluded off the beaten path. There were few people who made the trek. So we had a few moments to just rest and take in the beauty all around us. It was quiet except for the sound of the water rushing over the edge. We found a rock to sit on at the edge of the waterfall. We ate a snack and soaked our tired feet in the cool, refreshing water. But the journey wasn’t over. This was only the halfway point. We still had to make it back up to the trailhead. We had descended 1300 feet to get to the waterfall, and now we had to make our way back up.

The Promise

The trail was narrow, and difficult in spots. It was steep and rocky, but along the way, there were these sections of flat, wide trail. In those sections the ground under our feet was soft and we had a chance to catch our breath before going back to the hard. During the hike, I just wanted to get back to the car. When we finally made it back, I started looking through the pictures I had taken along the way. I was surprised to see a rainbow across the bottom of the waterfall. I didn’t see a rainbow when we were there, but somehow my phone had captured it. A rainbow is a reminder of God’s promises.

Jesus never promised an easy life. He does promise to lead us to streams of refreshing and be with us along the way. Keep pushing forward in your journey with God. Keep pursuing Him even when the trail is difficult. The reward for staying the course is great! I am so thankful my Jesus loves me enough to stay by my side even when I want to give up. And I am so thankful my husband takes me on difficult paths to beautiful waterfalls. The reward is great! Stay the course!

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April 27, 2020April 27, 2020Calling, Christian Walk, Following Jesus, Freedom in Christ

What Kind of Slavery Have you Been Freed From?

Here we are April 2020. Most of the world has been on lockdown for the last 6-8 weeks. We’ve been fighting an invisible enemy that has completely changed our way of life. We don’t know when this will end, or what the new normal will look like. This invisible enemy is attacking not just our physical bodies, but our very way of life. There are now two distinct and very different worlds, the one before the virus, and the one we now live in.

That sounds like the beginning of some dystopian novel right? Some work of fiction, or one of those movies about zombies come to take over the world, and you don’t know who will fall victim next. In many ways daily life hasn’t changed. I still get up at about the same time everyday. We eat three meals a day. We do school, we cut the grass. I bought plants and pots to put them in today at the hardware store. In many ways life hasn’t changed, but then again everything has changed. We’re told to keep our distance from others when we’re out. Many people are wearing masks. The store is out of toilet paper and Clorox wipes and has been for a while. You see a friend at the store, in the pre-virus world you would instinctively give this friend a hug. Now there’s a pause and distance is kept. Sports are canceled, vacations too. I was supposed to be out of town on a retreat with my husband this weekend, instead we stayed home.

I’ve found myself stuck lately. There are many voices talking about a “reset”. People are saying things like, God is going to use this to draw us back to Him. I’ve even said, “He’s allowed all the distractions to be removed, so we have no excuses.” Even with that knowing I’ve been like the Israelites in the desert looking back at Egypt. Missing all the things left behind. Today as I was looking back at what’s been left I felt the Lord issue a caution to me; “don’t get so distracted by what’s been left behind that you forget to look at where I’m is taking you.” I’ve been working my way through the final minor changes of Livin’ the Dream and making sure it’s ready to go to the printer. This week as I was busy looking back at my Egypt I felt the Lord whisper, “You need to read your book.” I want to share a short excerpt from Chapter 10. This excerpt is a commentary on Exodus 16:1-3.

Except from Livin’ the Dream, Chapter 10: Overcoming Doubt

“The Israelites are hangry. They’ve been traveling for two months, and they are just tired of being in the desert. They are hungry, it’s taking too long, and they are thirsty. I’m sure the children are getting just a little bit whiny at this point, and they’ve had enough of this ordeal. They have forgotten what life was like in Egypt. Instead of remembering their slavery, all they can think of is how good the food was. They are so consumed with their current suﬀering that they can’t look ahead to what God has promised them: a land and home of their own, ﬂowing with milk and honey, where they will live freely without taskmasters. They are looking behind at what they left to come here. Their doubt is so bright they’re nearly blinded by it. But what does God do to clear their sight? He sends manna, bread from heaven to comfort His people and draw them back to Himself. He satisﬁes their hunger. Can I get an amen? With that one miraculous act, He reminds them of all the miracles He performed in Egypt that brought them to this place. When doubt kicks in, it’s time to ask God to send help. Send the manna we need to get over that hurdle, send a reminder of your goodness and promises.”

We as a culture have been enslaved to many things prior to Covid19. Those things that had become like gods in our lives are being exposed and removed. We need to be aware of what God is highlighting in our own lives that had us caught in slavery. Don’t be quick to return to those things. Recognize they are gone, mourn if you must, but leave them behind because they are baggage and you can’t take them with you if you want to enter your Promise Land. It’s time to move forward in our walk with Jesus. What things is He highlighting that are baggage? Maybe they were even cozy at one time like a soft blanket, but even cozy blankets can be heavy and take up a lot of room. If this is truly a divine reset and God is preparing us to move into a new season we must be willing to leave things behind that will be a hindrance to us. I’m not even saying those things are necessarily sinful, some are, but some are just heavy weights that need to be left behind. I know for me God is revealing a lot of areas in my life that are just baggage. He wants to set us free from bondage so we can go where He is taking us. In the passage above the line that hits me right in the gut is this “Their doubt is so bright they’re nearly blinded by it.” Oh God that you would open my eyes to see clearly that I wouldn’t be blinded by my own doubt, my own longing to return to Egypt.

He came to set us free! He won’t do it by force, it’s up to us to surrender.

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February 19, 2020February 29, 2020Calling, Identity, Name Meaning, Purpose

Who Are You?

I’ve been asking this question a lot lately. Maybe it’s a mid-life deal? I don’t know. Regardless, I”ve found myself asking, “who am I”? I am a wife, mother, sister, aunt, intercessor, ministry leader, writer. None of these descriptions really seems to sum up who I am. I do all those things, but they don’t define me or my purpose. I’ve always been interested in name meanings. Each of my children have interesting, unique or unusual names. For each of them, their names were chosen deliberately. Some were chosen because of a specific meaning we wanted to speak over them. Others were chosen because God highlighted a verse in His word to us while I was pregnant. Our youngest was given a name that God showed us about 9 years before she was born. We knew the name was for her and we reserved it, even though there were other children who were born in those nine years. We held that name for her. It holds a great deal of meaning even pointing in some ways to her destiny.

Names are important. Each time I speak my children’s names I’m declaring something over them. My oldest Son’s name is Tadao. It’s Japanese, it means “Gentle Warrior”. When I was pregnant with him and we began seeking the Lord for a name we felt impressed by the Holy Spirit that our son would be a worshipping warrior, much like King David in the Bible. He would be a worshipper, but he would also know how to war, and his worship would be warfare. I’m only beginning to see the fruit of this name choice. For sixteen years every time I speak his name I am declaring over him, “you are a worshipping warrior”! It’s a powerful declaration.

Until very recently I felt a negative connotation over my own name and it’s meaning. Melissa means, “honeybee”. I embody this name meaning well. I am always working on something, moving from one thing to the next. A busy worker Bee, describes my personality well. Why is that a bad thing, you may be asking. I’ve grown up in church and throughout childhood when I was taught the story of Mary and Martha I was always told, “be like Mary, because she chose the better thing”. The better thing being, sitting at the feet of Jesus. I have a hard time sitting and just soaking in Jesus’ presence. I’ve been led to believe this is a negative. That to be a good Christian, one must sit, and be still with Jesus. In practical terms this looks like long extended quiet times, getting up before dawn to have that time with the Lord before the distractions of the day. In heart terms it looks like years of guilt carried on my back because my best quiet times happen while I’m working. As a busy mom, the kitchen sink is one of my most visited prayer rooms. I have had quiet times in the laundry room while moving a load from the washer to the dryer. I’ve worshipped Jesus extravagantly while mowing the lawn (yes, I’m fairly certain my neighbors think I’ve lost my mind sometimes). A “quiet time” doesn’t have to be done while sitting.

I was talking with a friend recently about name meanings and she asked, “what does Melissa mean?” I scoffed as I replied, “honeybee, and I hate it”. I explained why, and then she preceded to shed light on why I was wrong. She informed me that honeybees’ are hard workers, they communicate with each other by dancing, they work together with each member doing their task to benefit the whole hive, and they make honey. This sweet liquid is the result of their work. Without Honeybees’ hard work pollinating, the world would be void of many flowers, fruits and vegetables because these plants require a pollinator in order to produce a harvest. This idea that being a honeybee is a positive has really shifted my entire viewpoint of who I am in light of my name meaning and calling in life. As I dug into this concept a little more and began to do research on my name I quickly discovered another version of my name that caught my eye. According to https://themeaningofthename.com/melissa/: “In Ireland it is sometimes used as a feminine form of the Gaelic male name Maoilíosa, which means “servant of Jesus”. Wow! All this time I’ve been thinking of the serving of Martha as a negative, but this meaning has brought a new perspective.

What if, when Jesus said that Mary had chosen the better way, what He was really saying was that her attitude was better than Martha’s? After all, someone has to prepare and serve the food. Someone has to clean up after the meal, and someone has to make the guests feel welcome. I propose Martha was doing all these things because that was her role in the home at that time. The problem was not that she was serving Jesus instead of sitting at His feet. I suspect the problem was that she was doing it with the wrong heart. Jesus is after our heart.

Who are you? Are you more of a Martha, or a Mary? Are you a busy worker bee, or are you content with the calm peaceful times at the feet of Jesus? The challenge is not to be something that we were not made to be. The challenge is to live our calling and serve Jesus with a pure heart. Not jealous of someone else’s calling. Martha complained to Jesus and asked Him to tell her sister to get up and help her. Mary was doing the better thing, not because Jesus didn’t value the hard work of Martha. Mary was doing what was better, because her heart was in the right place. The better thing is to serve Jesus. If that looks like spending hours in your prayer closet listing out all your neighbors and friends and lifting them up to God, do that! If that is taking a meal to a sick friend, do that. If that is offering a listening ear to a grieving neighbor when you’re out walking the dog, do that. Serve Jesus! As Christians we are all called to honor God with our lives. That’s who you are. You are a Christ follower, so live in such a way that your life points others to Him.

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